Morticia Miscalculamation

[What's great is I only have write about half of my material anymore]

"I'm sure Douche Bush fired Rumsfeld yesterday in part to limit press coverage of the Democratic victory. Bump them off of a few headlines.

But he screwed up because the best thing to do would have been to have animatronic Nancy Pelosi all over the teevee for a couple of news cycles. Give the people a couple days of THAT nightmare and then come back from Crawford all loose and jokey and rested from a long weekend of tequila, cocaine, and Mexican blow jobs.

'Heya guys! I'm back! Ditcha miss me? [huh-huh] Who let Granma Morticia in here? [snort]. Jesus, somebody open a window (if you know what I mean?). Hey granny, pull muh finger [hee-hee]'"

- The Otter