The British Press Presents: A Great American Story

As reported by the London's Telegraph:

Fancy dress parties drive women to drink

Well, it's not as simple as that (let's not jump the causation gun so quickly, OK?). I know because I fancy myself a "scientist" too. And furthermore, I know the professorial scholars who conducted the actual research.

It's John and Mark. They're the "scientists!" [**Sniff** My little Creed's growing up....]

Quote:

"Women drink more than men at fancy dress parties, scientists say.

Previous research into alcohol consumption in social gatherings has almost universally found men drink more than women.

However researchers who attended 66 American student parties found this to be true, except when they involved guests wearing fancy dress - especially with a sexual theme.

Just over 15 per cent of the parties had themes, including some of a sexual nature - including lingerie, "anything but clothes" and "just had sex".

Lead author Dr John Clapp, director of the Centre for Alcohol and Drug Studies at San Diego State University, said that as his team was unable to explain the surprise finding it would be necessary to carry out further field work."

This is indeed a great story: sex, women, alcohol. But, what makes it the great American genius success story of all time is it involves: sex, women, alcohol, research, pay, and the necessity to carry out "further field work."

I'm standing and singing God Bless America while tears stream down my face.