For Mr. Fong

For Mr. Fong

For Hire or Lease: One 34 year-old male news junkie. Available for immediate assignment in high-risk, high-octane situations. Hazard pay welcome (but may not be required). Will travel to the ends of the earth if provided with a full expense account and carte blanche with regard to Story Control. Please send all inquiries care of Mr. Fong, agent and manager.

Located in Sonoma County, California, subject continues to search for work as freelance writer, photojournalist, or professional caddie and underwater cave explorer. Currently studying as helicopter pilot, foreign language interpreter, and 5-star Cajun sauce chef. If these endeavors fail subject plans on becoming head offensive coordinator of the arena football San Jose SaberCats or professional punt returner (for said SabreCats) with dreams of working for the "Planet Earth" TV series, National Geographic, or joining the crew of Anthony Bourdain's "No Reservations" travel/writing/eating show. Subject enjoys spending time refining ninja skills and designing the perfect spicy bloody Mary as well as occasional 'Cup Caking', Coffee and the NY Times and Rainy Day Bed Parties.

Send all donations or food and beer care of C.J.M.K to Mr. Fong.