A. I'm completely annoyed by these so-called "life bloggers" -- writers (people with fancy "writing degrees"), so-called hipsters, and urban pioneers with no real-world cred, tons of safety net family bread, and retread affect (especially their fake/mock black talk "attitude" -- you go, girlfriend!). They've never had a hard break in their entire lives. They have no context. They need to just STFU. Seriously. Those people are bothering me today. They ain't got no talent. I'm over yuns.
To be clear, there are some interesting "voices" out there, some real and true inspiration. But for the most part they are as formulaic and trite as Everybody Loves Raymond - stale, boring, laugh-track genre lemmings. Most of 'em are all just leaves on a big old dumb-ass tree.
I just wanted to say that. Thanks.
[But maybe I'm just annoyed to be just another leaf on that big old dumb-ass tree. If so, hopefully I'm that, misshapen crinkly brown leaf that's ready to drop off said tree around early July (late June perhaps). I'm sure I suck too but I'm just sayin'.... Speaking of which...]
B. People have been bugging the hell out of me to post a goddamn bio. WTF? While I hate these kinds of things, generally, I guess it could be helpful for my burgeoning award-winning fame.
Ty's Bio by "Ty"
Apart from dance, Ty enjoys exploring the realm of classical/operatic music. He also adores reading books ranging from Jewish history and customs to fantasy/science fiction in addition to the classics, especially Charles Dickens. Above all else, Ty enjoys learning about God and wants to spend his life doing His work. With his cheerful and helpful attitude he is always a joy to be around. We are all blessed to have him be a part of the company.
Tall and dark, actor Ty has the kind of deep-set eyes and sharp features that make him ideal for roles such as the self-absorbed yuppie cast a cold gaze in Zack Snyder's Dawn of the Dead and the authoritative yet undeniably vain plastic surgeon on the CBS sitcom Out of Practice. And while his background may indeed be in Repertory Theater, it is in the worlds of film and television that he has truly come into his own.
Ty is a certified Project Management Professional (PMP®) and has acquired a Project Management Certificate from the University of Phoenix. He has conducted corporate training for companies such as USWEST, Axient Communications, and ON Semiconductor. He is a member of the University of Phoenix Faculty, where he has consulted and developed several project management courses that are used nationally.
Ty started his own bodyguarding business specializing in high risk bodyguarding cases where clients had been subjected to death threats and attempted assassinations. Ty's bodyguarding work has taken him all over the world, from Israel and Europe to Asia and South America. Ty's company also contracted out to the United States government for numerous special operations in Israel, Spain, Africa, etc.
When Ty presented his brother's drawing of a blue bird as his own in kindergarten, his teacher was so impressed she asked him to draw another while the class looked on. Armed with a blue Crayola, Ty stared at a blank sheet of white paper for several long, silent minutes before vowing two things: he would never lie and he would learn to draw. Fifteen years later, Ty began his professional art career with Hallmark Greeting Cards.
Prior to the past few years, Ty’s claim to songwriting fame was “Every Time That It Rains,” which he co-wrote with his friend Garth Brooks on the superstar’s debut album. “It was like taking a short course in songwriting,” Ty says. “Working with Garth taught me a lot about coming up with a song idea, exploring it and then following it through.”
These experiences led Ty to experiment with comedy as an outlet through which to both cope with his past and, as he discovered very quickly, entertain others. "I just tell people about my problems growing up. I tell them my personal stories in a way they can relate to. They understand the problems and the pain involved in these experiences. Though I tell them in a funny way, they begin to see why these are really serious issues. I simply try to relate to my audience in a way that may help them make a difference in a friend's life or even their own lives. I just do it through comedy."
Suppressing his sexual feelings while growing up, Ty finally had a gay sexual encounter with a fellow student while attending Georgia Southern University. During his last six months there, in 1992, he was approached by a modeling scout in a shopping mall. Dealing with heavy credit card debt, he began a career first as a fitness and calendar model and then as a porn star under the name Ty Fox. He quickly developed a huge fan following, largely due to his powerful, muscular build and enthusiastic screen performances.
Oh, and his tombstone read, "...and he ate pussy like his life depended on it."
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