Ask Ty...March 4

Sigh. Hi it's me, Ty. Well, it's warm still but the sun's gone. Rain in the forecast...sigh....

Remember Iowa? Remember New Hampshire? South Carolina? Florida? Super Tuesday? The Potomac Primaries? Well, I suppose it's not just another Tuesday. It's Last Stand Tuesday (Hillary). Otter Prince Tuesday (Rich). Dentist Tuesday (Me). Ask Ty Tuesday (for all of you).

Q: I know, I know...you're done with politics. But I must say this. As much as I hate to hear Ralph Nader go on and on about what the potential front runners are NOT talking about, the question needs to be asked:

• Why isn't anyone talking about the disenfranchised voters or rigged voting machines anymore?
  

• Why isn't anyone talking about the hurricane Katrina response or its so-called "victims?" (Also check out a good piece in The New Yorker about the California wildfires in which Target® was on hand to give away free gift cards and clothes at Qualcomm stadium. Free massages and food were plentiful.

The only reason I bring this up is that I recently re-watched Spike Lee's When The Levees Broke. A doc with equal parts tragedy and fury.

[Also, I've got a couple ideas in the works for a "Remember Katrina - Obama '08" or "People of the Lower Ninth Ward for Clinton" t-shirts.]

The bottom line is this: There's some big time payback coming for a whole generation of political beat-down and if Obama/Hilary and the DNC drop the ball on this one -- on this Cake Walk -- I will officially resign from my duties as a Full Time Political Junkie and High-Stakes Gambler (currently I have Obama beating McCain by 17 electoral votes and my Fantasy VP is Noam Chomsky (imagine him in foreign relations?)).

- Cassady

Ty: Cass. Good questions and even better observations.

Seriously. You're asking some important questions at a very good time. But, you're misguided, kid. You've probably let your hatred for (God Bless) America cloud your thinking. Your questions are truly important...for a pinko, communist liberal. Get off of your ivory tower high-horse soapbox and join us real (God Bless) Americans (for McCain) and think about what is really important for (God Bless) Americans.

The real questions for this particular election cycle are:

• Does a (God Bless) America lapel pin really define you as a real (God Bless) American?

• Does begging for votes Saturday Night Live disgrace your campaign and lower the stature of president to variety show status?

• The environment?
  

• When's the next Super Bowl® in the Big Easy? When can I buy some titties for beads?!

• Iraq? Iran? iPod? iPhone? I rule! Ey Carumba.
  

Disenfranchised voters? FEMA responses? C'mon? What's your problem? (God Bless) Americans don't care about that junk. The TeeVee writers strike is over, son. All is good. President McCain will keep us safe from the terrorists. If you don't have anything to hide, stop crying about wiretaps. That's all that counts. Get over your self, comrade. Whatever!

Just a guess,

- ty

Post script (because I know Cass is a huge football fan): The Favre Barge is gonna sail! That's right, the Favre Barge (rhymes). Literally, that's the custom barge that Brett Favre had built like five years ago when he was on the brink of retirement. It's basically a Mississippi river barge decked out to rival the world's most bad-ass custom yacht.

Favre's goal was, "when the time comes ]to retire], we will sail my "Favre Barge" from La Crosse to Jackson. People waving all along the route [of the Mississippi river], me sounding the fog horn [sic]." Well, after a fantastic '07-'08 season people, the Favre Barge is sailing. Dates to be announce, but probably around the beginning of May when it's warm. Look for it when it floats by your neck of the Mississipi river.