Wednesday

Show Time

My advice to the presumptive Democratic nominee:

Quit with the diners and bowling alleys and get back to the arenas and laser shows.

- Rickey Powell
Indeed. Enough of the hokey, small-town waffle-eating photo opportunities, the shirtsleeve handshaking outside of factories, and the tiny-lectern man-on-man "discussions" about gasoline prices at gas stations. That shit's all fake anyhow. It's show time now.

You may hate the person (George Bush), but the presidency is bad ass (George Washington). To be president is to be the closest thing to All Supreme Being that exists today (Kim Jong Il). Presidents don't bowl at public bowling alleys. Nixon had a bowling alley installed in the White House. That's where presidents bowl.

It's all about the big time. Posse, limos, sweet suits, private planes, and "Hail to the Chief" everywhere you to. What, you're going to have the United States Marine Corps band play "Hail to the Chief" at Gomer's Diner in Kankakee? Please!

Sure, we may feel all intellectually and morally superior to George W. Bush, but you know what? He's the president, that's what. And you know what else? You're not. So you really should shut the hell up.

Forget arenas and laser shows; bring on 24/7 all-network coverage and F-22s!
I'll bring the change/I got your hope
Move over Cheney/44's no mope
Represent!

Also, we have now learned something quite valuable. We now know that America is slightly less racist than sexist. Thus Mr. Obama.

Now the new question: Is America more racist or ageist?

Remember the other Clinton beat Bob "Viagra" Dole and his pen in 1996. We'll find out on November 4.

That's it.