Tricker-Treet

I fucking hate Halloween and Tricker-Treet but I have a six-year old and we live in some retarded upscale (pretentious) "new urbanist" thing and we all have to gather in the "mews" for cider and chili and some dumb, awkward ass conversation before Tricker-Treeting. There's an expectation, you see. We're like rich, awkward Quakers. Like it or not I'm part of a Community. I wish Barack would come organize my community though.

Especially, I hate all the greedy little fuckers and their Great Candy Nab. Just take the the candy. I really don't care. Can't I just sign up to write a check to avoid the whole thing? Didn't I already write a check for this? Jesus!

The kids who drive (are driven) into the hood because they think they'll get full sized Snickers® Three Musketeers® and such (because they heard about that rumor) are the very best. Problem is, lots of people around here literally have TWO bowls; one for the neighbor kids and one for the...uh, for the other kids...the ones from other neighborhoods. See? Homies from 'round the way will always get the short stick because we will always have two Americas just like John "likes pussy more than power" Edwards said that one time when he wasn't reminding us that his goddamn daddy was a mill worker.

And you can tell who the "other kids...the ones from other neighborhoods" are too...I'll give you a hint: skin. You're right! The dark skin is a giveaway. But more than that, it's how fucking excited these kids are about Tricker-Treet. The little fuckers that live here are all jaded and over it and shit. Little $60 costumed Incredible® doesn't give a real shit anymore. But home slice from the other side of the freeway in the pillow case for a costume (either ironic Klansman or a "ghost") is juiced on this shit. One day a year they can kick it in the "rich neighborhood" without being questioned by the police is heaven. And to the observer and the actor (the self and the other), it's fairly anonymous. A great day. A great day indeed is Tricker-Treet. I'm sure there are kids who think about Tricker-Treeting in my neighborhood and get chills.

When I was a poor, black, apartment-dwelling kid we'd go to "Marywood" and Tricker-Treet like royalty. I get chills thinking about that.