One-Man Show (All Week + Sunday Mantinee) 3.0

Today feels totally different.

This feeling...is very difficult to explain. It's like I've graduated to some new level. Like crossing state lines in the country at night, I realize that some hurdle was jumped yet most contexts feel remarkably similar. New title, new office. The last planet aligned. New light bulbs. And as interesting as this realization is, new responsibilities fill the in-box in this new office.

Rich will know that it is like "levels & worlds" and Big Dave Wave knows it feels much like the "search for the Banana Slug King."

It's like there is this question of "greatness" on my mind; on my plate. Like I can see it in others but have never, ever felt a real, personal discussion would focus my direction. All previous talk deflected like bullets from Wonder Woman's bracelets. Ridiculed as nonsense or hyperbole. Haunted by greatness. Maybe I know something now. Like if I don't achieve this greatness (as impossibly defined by myself), it's all been for naught. Or, not in the fulfillment of the potentials. Or massively disappointing somebody or something. Like opportunities squandered, as always.

I know it's hard for you to understand. I am barely scratching the shell on my end.

Yet my natural tendencies lead me to question everything. So. What is "this?" How does it all come together where it, at least, begins to make some sense...to me?

Where are the truths?

All I see around me is like a gaggle of all these children playing grown-up, acting like they know what they're supposed to be doing. Meetings. Fake formal talk. All around me. Shoes a dozen sizes too large.

I almost NEED to demonstrate...something. Maybe my greatest piece will be shutting up. No cameras, no instruments, no pens or papers. Just thoughts. Full and robust thinking. No matter where you are you can be a producer, a creator. Not just a consumer. Full of beautiful thinking.

Bottom line though: if you want to ever do a thing. You gotta do that thing your damn self. Nobody will every match your thinking, planning, or intensity with your thing. Period (perhaps exclamation point).

And here's the very best part: No antsiness. No lowness. No confusion or depression. Just calm and fresh.

Today feels totally different.